Just finished 'Bloodsucking Fiends' by Christopher Moore.
I would have sent a long, drawn out review of the book to Cricket, but I wanted an excuse to update my bloggy.
That's right, I'm thinking of pet names for this blog. I'm stuck on them, however, so expect to see different names to pop up every now and again. ANYWAY.
Christopher is a funny, smart man but has a stupid ideas of women. I just hateee that all his women are perfect and have hardly any flaws. He makes the main character in the story go shopping, have regular wants and complaints as any stereotypical woman. When she dresses up nice, he makes all the men notice and how she likes it, etc.
People wonder why I never read/write about women as main characters. They're annoying as hell, that's why. They always seem to be so fucking stupid. And they're whiny. How come women always have to so unbelievable whiny and crying everywhere? Always falling in love, finding romance in killings, etc.
But, the way he knows how to write a group of guys who drink and do drugs together is hilarious, hahaha. The Animals were the best thing to his books save for The Emperor. The fact that he had extensive knowledge about the smell of weed made me nod and repeat, "Oh, he knows."
Okay, so, he also made the most memorable scene in a book since I read about Armand and his Master/Maker barebacking it in 'The Vampire Lestat.' He made some greasy skinned, balding, fat man as a coroner and made him a necrophiliac. And, he took time to make it where it described his foreplay, the way he would talk to the dead body and the way he would strip them down, the anticipation, the drool. Ugh, it was so awesome.
Whenever I write a book, I'm referring to that, or writing my own version.
(Oh, and how my song fits this scene so well.)
I DETEST the speed of everything. Yeah, it was a short book, I understand. But none of those characters I could get in touch with, emotionally. And randomly, as if it would be amusing or something, he sent Jody's mother into the book. How boring. So random. Like, he tried to describe things which a person would normally forget - calling the 'rents. It bothered me to no extent. It just did. Even the snapping turtles, yes, yes, they made use of the ending, but it doesn't matter. I can't describe why I hated it so much, I just do/did.
IN OTHER NEWS.
I'm making another layout. This one is just the blogger version of the 'hemmingway' from wordpress. No, I didn't make it, haha.
But, I am working on my own personal layout so no one else could possibly have the same layout as me. I have an obsession and it's rather sad.
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