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Tuesday, June 30, 2009

♪: black eyed peas - Boom Boom Pow

At Cricket's, she has this One-year-old and a half nephew.
He's adorable.
And loves to slobber.
Anyway.
As I exited the bathroom, the little guy came up to me, pointed to some distant point behind himself and began talking in jibber-jabber. He would then intend to pause and let me reply in whatever manner I wanted. For the first time, I was literally stunned to silence. I had no idea what to say (which is very rare for me). Then, as if my silence was an answer he could live with, he continues to speak in baby-tongues.
His mom comes around the fridge (hahahaha, I'M HORRIBLE, ACKKKK) and says, "Just say go away and push him away."
"I can't! He's trying to conversate with me... I would feel bad if I just left in the middle."
I hear Cricket giggle from her room and the nephew's mom just gives me this confused expression. "Just walk away."
"No! I don't know what to do. It'll be rude if I walk away or just ignore him. I can't do that to anyone else."
The nephew talks more, glancing between me and his mom, "sdlfndsfgdsgdnjgdg blah mama afdsfmnfsd."
He ceased talking and just looked at me with his big eyes and we stared at each for a minute and to solve my rudeness factor I just wave and say, "Byyyyeeee!"
He replies, "Byeee!"

So, the point of this is if anyone else feels the same way I do. I don't want the kid to think he's nothing to me, haha. I would just feel so rude treating him like a dog barking at my feet, or a cat meowing at my feet, ackkkk.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

♪: 3oh!3 - don't trust me

Good news!
I bought new yarn (earth purple and brown) and am going to make a double-sided scarf. I haven't decided what stitch I wanna use, but it's in the works!
I'm now practising my purl and knit stitch. I'm FINALLY getting all right at the purl, it's harder than it looks when you haven't knitted in a month due to low supplies :(
AHH.
I'm excited.
It's depressing to me that my cat hardly finds yarn is interesting.

Shush girl, shut your lips, do the hellen keller and talk with your hipppssss.
(shhh, the song is hilarious.)

Billy Mayes... dead? The news shocked me hard. I was in the living room with my sister and mom when I read the news on G4 while watching The Lost Boys (is it my imagination that the older brother looks like a straighter version of George Michaels?). I had to explain who he was, but damn.
Has anyone noticed that when a celebrity dies, a whole lot of them die?
It's a fad like having as many babies as you can.
No one should exploit children like that.
Not even children stars should be exploited as much as they are. I mean, their egos grow to this deadly size and when it's crushed, the kids, as teens, young adults, turn to drugs.
"WHY CAN'T THEY FEED ME EGO?" The whores tell them anything they want to know and so does the drink. The can 'lick' any man anywhere (yes, including women).
And why is it that the popular drugs for celebs is just heroine, meth, cocaine? Everyone does pot, once or twice, but still. Why can't it be acid or shrooms? Would it be because the paparazzi is so consistent that them on a hallucegine would be fucking scary as hell?
Could you imagine the red carpet on acid?
It'll be like walking on blood, a river of blood.
The good will be you know what it would feel like if you ever could walk on a river of blood.

TELL HIM I'M A VEGETARIAN AND I'M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF HIM.

ps - I wore my politics make me so horny shirt today. Suprisingly no one MY AGE says anything about it. They'll read it and go on, only the older ladies will say something. Not one bad comment yet. Just, "Ooh, a sense of humour," and, "I want to wear that to work, hahaha."
If it means anything, Readers, I bought the shirt in the Obama VS McCain presidency. HAAAAAAAAA.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

♪: groomer has it

Everyone, PLEASE READ THE FUCKING HILARIOUS BLOG POST (BEST WEEK EVER BLOG) ABOUT THE NEW ALICE IN WONDERLAND MOVIE!

hahahahaha, it's so funny.

♪: tom jones - it's not unusual

BASICS
1. Full Name and age: Heather Marie Borders, 19
2. Where do you live? Bah, the second retirement state, Kentucky.
3. What is your house like? Clash. Everything clashes.
4. Single or Taken? One is the loneliest number that you'll ever dooooo.
5. Do you have siblings? One sister.
6. What are your hobbies? Reading, writing and knitting.
7. Where do/did you go to school? Just the silly High School - nothing else.
8. What do you do for a job? Being a beggar a job?

HAVE YOU EVER
9. Broken a bone? Jammed a finger. It still hurt, okay?
10. Got road rage? Haha, yes. When someone cuts me off.
11. Drank so much you passed out? Hahaha, ohhhhhhhhh. Yes. Alex, "Omg, Cricket, clean it up, it stinks!"
12. Been on a road trip? ...Yes, haha.
13. Skipped class? 24 times in my Senior year, once Junior year.
14. Danced in the rain? Yes ;)
15. Broken someones heart? Yes, haha. We're still friends, though.
16. Been overseas? Nope.
17. Been thrown out of a pub? Not yet.
18. Crashed your car? I've been in a car that has crashed.
19. Played drinking games till you threw up? Never, ew.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF
20. The day outside? So hot I want to test the saying, "Cook an egg on the sidewalk."
21. What your wearing? Half-pants (I like to call them) and my 2005 Six Flags Frightfest t-shirt, haha.
22. Your group of friends? Each very different.
23. Summer v Winter? Winter.
24. David Bain: Does not have my vote.
25. Drinking hard out? Never again.
26. Being a bad ass? 100% of the time.
27. How you look? I could care less.

DO YOU PREFER
28. Choc or vanilla? Milk, ice cream, suckers, candy bars? I like my choc and vanilla to be mixed with ice cream. Other than that, Vanilla.
29. Night clubs or house party? House Parties, but I don't like parties anyway.
30. The other sex with brown or blonde hair? Not blonde. I dislike blonde.
31. The other sex with long or short hair? If a guy has long hair he better take care of it, but, either, I don't care unless he doesn't take care of it, then short.
32. High heels or flats? For me? I wear neither. I don't have clothes to fit either, but, if I had to pick, boots with jeans and high heels with dresses... unless I'm doing the hippie style, then boots.
33. TV or going out? DEFINITELY outside.
34. Peircings or tattoos? Either. Not on me, but someone else is always welcomed.
35. Maccas or BK? Wth is a maccas? BK. I love the commercials.
36. Auckland or Wellington? Don't know?
37. Sushi or fish n chips? Sushi! I dislike fried foods.

TELL US...
38. A crazy thing you've done: I've done a lot of crazy shit... Not really hotdog, mailbox type stuff, but getting high in broad daylight, watching dinner traffic pass is kind of crazy I suppose.
39. Are you a romantic? I hate to admit that's an affirmative.
40. What is your dream date? Nothing stupid like restaurants and beaches, but something like alarms are going off and we're getting arrested.
41. Fav perfume? Ooh, I recently discovered the 'music' scent of Harajuku scene. I LOVE IT SO.
42. Fav song? (I love Spaceman, Jellyfish... LOVE IT). Uh, Ain't that a kick in the head - Dean Martin.
43. Your run in with the cops: I have, on this. It's even in my anniversary post, haha.
44. The drunkest you've ever been was when: Definitely the first time I ever drink... Never, again.
45. Whats next in life for you: Getting a story published - it's harder than you think.
46. What you'd do if you won lotto: Buy my parents a nice place in flordia and buy my mom her fav car ever - mini-cooper, haha.
47. Your thoughts on marriage and kids: Neither. I want kids, but I have this anger problem, haha. Don't want to beat kids, but I don't believe in marriage, really.
48. Your last real date: What? As 'bf/gf'? I never had one, haha. Never cared to...
49. On a Friday night youll be: At home, reading. Like I was last night, ahhhhh.
50. On a Saturday night youll be: #49.
51. How smart were you at school? By grades? Not that smart. By word of mouth, a lot of people thought I was very intelligent. That's what they told me, haha. no one has ever called me stupid?
52. Where you were at the millenium: Petting my dog with my dad and sister watching this Nick thing.
53. You drive a: 1998 Ford Escort.
54. At a dress up party, you'll be wearing: I have an old Steak-n-Shake uniform. More than likely that. Or be a hooker again.
55. Best place to shop is: Electronic Store, muahaaaaa.
56. Will you pick truth or dare: Depends if I'm sober or not.
57. Something embarassing: I adoreee Barbie movies. I have most of them, over half and can recite, word by word, Babrie and the Nutcracker.

FINALLY
58. Who was the last person to text you? Casey.
59. What was the last nice thing you did for someone? Bought a friend some drinks (tea, sillies).
60. What was the last bad thing you did to someone? Got angry, got angry some more and decided I'm through with them until they take responsibility and realize, YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING VICTIM, GODDAMMIT.
61. Are you the 4th hottest in your group of friends? I don't really think I'm cute at all, muahaaaa.
62. Anything you havent told your parents? It'll be easier if I said, 'what they do know.'
63. Have any regrets? Never being able to finish Mary Poppins. I hate that movie.
64. How much money would it take for you to sleep with Oprah Winfrey? Not money, I just want a FREE CAR.
65. Amy Winehouse is: an easy target for Graham Norton.
66. Your celeb crush? Wow, I don't have one.
67. At a party your the person who is: unknown, then known by the end because I'm so wondrously funny? haha.
68. Fav album: Beauty and the Beast Soundtrack, haha. Not joking.
69. Why are you doing this? I.am.so.bored.
70. Who else will do this? No one, bet.

Friday, June 26, 2009

♪: michael jackson - thriller

I think we all know the reason for this song. That's all I will say on the matter.

I am soooo tired. Know why? Of course not.
I stayed up to midnight to finish CELL. Don't adjust your televisions, that fucking book is FINALLY finished, woo hoo!
I liked how it ended, but I did not like the casualties. I usually kill all the good people, bargh.

Good thing I went to BNN with Casey again today. I noticed a sign proclaiming that Chuck Barris would be a special guest tomorrow. So, there's my day tomorrow. I'm going to beg the parents for money, if not, what's the point of going? I can't really stand in line (he'll be too popular to just talk with, his table will be SWARMED), I don't have a book to be autographed.
This makes me so sad.

Does anyone realize just how many people claim to be gay/bi-sexual? GEEZ. It's like someone injected 98% of the population with the 'gay gene' and told them to just go crazy with it.
Boys are so overrated anyway.

Casey - Ughhhh, IT'S SO HOT. You need to turn on your air conditioner, I'm melting, blah blah blah
Me - Geez, you're acting like it's 200-degrees with no o-zone layer.

HALO, I CAN SEE YOUR HALO, HALO, HALOOOO.

ps - Casey's dog, Toby, fucking hates me. He nearly ate me at the doorway, then followed Casey to her bedroom, walked out, growled and snapped at me, then went back. I acted like I was going to take a step forward from the threshold and he barked again. It was so scary. He's the second dog in the entire history of my life to hate me. Dogs usually fucking love me.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

♪: meet the robinsons

Woo-hoo! Cannot sleep.

Fuck, now I have the hiccups.
Now they're gone, finally, after two cups of water.

I watched Lilo & Stitch the other day, for maybe the fifth time. I hadn't watched it in years. It's still funny. Don't ask me.
Here, educate yourself... That used to be my quote, ack.

Btw, I am like the Sudoku grand master or something. I fucking kick ass, white belt style. I have another book that doesn't really go by belts to make the game MORE Asian, when, in fact, it was created here or in England, keep forgetting. Japan made it popular by adding Karate style and a cool 3-syllable word. They know how to get things done.

I am nearly finished with CELL. A hundred more pages. Shortly after the 150th page, the book FINALLY, FUCKING FINALLY, became interesting. Really interesting. Mr King finally brought in the Villain, the sexy, leader of the Pulse Villain. I love those characters - cool, collected, can kick ass anytime they want, etc... Ackkkk.

Molly snuffed off some Asian man with his kid the other day. She was just finally getting to rest in the heat and him and his 1-year-old son wanted to pet her. He called her over and as she was walking to him, he asked me, "She's not mean or bite, or anything?"
Why ask that AFTER you call her over?
So, I answered, "Uh, I don't think so. Let's hope not."
Hahahaha.
Anyway, she sniffed him, looked at the kid and walked away, waiting on me trying to order her a water, hahah.
He tried to call her over again and it didn't work, she just ignored him like he wasn't even there. I think she may be raciest. I hope so, that would be hilarious.
And so stereotypical.

Ordered my mom's b-day cake yesterday. Yellow cake, white icing decorated with sunflowers and daisies, the words Happy Birthday, Mama sita. What I don't get is how they're going to put white petals on white icing for the daisies. I didn't think of that right away. Oh well, they'll figure it out, if not, it'll be funny.

His destructive programming is taking effect. He will be irresistibly drawn to large cities, where he will back up sewers, reverse street signs, and steal everyone's left shoe.

ps - the cat is in my lap, sleeping, head draped over my leg and it's SO DAMN ADORABLE.
I love animals, so much.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

♪: audrey - Repense à moi

A Barnes & Noble, after she gets done eating, Casey says with a sigh, "Ahhh, I think I'm going to get something to read..."
I reply nonchalantly, since I have several magazines, "Would you like Vogue Knitting?"

Haha, today was 'randomly fun,' as so says Casey. And I learned something about her today - she hates when people wear out-of-season scents. It literally bothers her, she even went on a little rant about how pumpkin spice should NOT be worn because it's an autumn scent, not summer, not spring, nor winter.
She even smelled her hand, "Oh great, now AUTUMN is on my hand."
"Really, Casey? If that isn't the girliest thing I have ever heard you say, or do, for that matter."

Saw an old man snoozing in one of the chairs at BNN. He had his little slippers off, head back and mouth open. It was adorable.

Monday, June 22, 2009

♪: george gershwin - rhapsody in the blue

While eating a raw carrot and drinking tea out of my stout Winnie the Pooh mug, I keep trying to imagine different styles of hair on me. Hahaha, some of them I come up with... 'The Soccer Mom,' 'The German Gigolo,' '70s Shag,' and 'Korean Drama Hair.'
I'll let you all fill in the images of said styles. It's better that way.
I'm trying to find a decent Shag style from either the 60s or the 70s. I'm growing out my hair again. I realized just how short my hair was a year ago. THEN I WENT SHORTER. I dared myself and did this little 20s thing. So, now, it's finally to my shoulders. If my hair didn't curl, it'd be a little past my shoulder. Until it's just past my shoulder blades, I need a style.
I adore the hippie, earthy type clothing. Yes, it's "in" right now, but bleh.
Hahahahha, I still tell my mother I'm growing my hair out for dreadlocks. She hates ittttt.
Little does she know, I've seriously considered it before. My face is too round - it'd be awkward.

Damn, that's short.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

♪: danzig - thirteen

Our electricity was out for FOUR hours last night. Right before bed time. So, it got hot, I couldn't sleep and played Sudoku for an hour, read for an hour and laid there for an hour, listening to the horrible sounds emitting from Molly.
Then I let her outside, waited, let her back in, pet the cat, Princess, laid down some more. By the end of the night, finally tired enough to fall into sleep, nearly into dream world when I heard this taptaptap sound at my window.
Still, to this very nanosecond, I have no idea if someone was there, it was very large droplets of water or an animal, but it scared me.
Good thing it happened too because when I was trying to see out my window, I noticed this huge, ugly bug on my floor. It was very scary looking. I killed it, and cried a little - always do when I kill a bug... WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?
Went back to bed. Nearly asleep again when the electricity kicked in.
1:50AM.

At brunch me and Amanda decided to go to the movies. We got some money, headed out.
Watched Hangover.
Let me tell you something - that movie was so obviously catering to the need of some drunken frat boys laughing, giggling to each other. Don't get me wrong, it had funny parts (I wouldn't watch it again). It didn't get truly funny until The Asian Man introduced himself by flying out of the car and latching onto one of the men.
The movie did have an awesome sound track. What made it funny was the amount of songs you'd think would be impossible to fit into a movie at one time. Nope. They took every chance to get a song in there, even ten seconds of a chorus. It got annoying after awhile.
But the pictures at the credits were the funniest part of the movie. Hahahaha, Carrot Top.

Then, we snuck into Year One.
That movie is not just about cavemen, it's a religious movie, before Jesus walked the earth, haha. I was reminded of Lamb several times (Christopher Moore).
Simple story line, quite a few funny parts. I would rather watch that movie rather than Hangover again. Maybe it's just because I have this girly crush on Michael Cera.
Let's be honest - it's Jack Black. I have me a crush on Jack Black.

Btw, THEY'RE MAKING A FUCKING MOVIE OF I LOVE YOU, BETH COOPER. I was NOT expecting to see that anytime soon. I read the book (such a man-book it was, too) and nearly yelled it when I realized it was Beth Cooper. It seems like it's made from the same people who keep pooping out American Pie movies, Bring It On movies and silly druken sex with geeky boys movies.
The character for the main's bff was cuter than the actual main character, haha.
I'm going to go see it - it seemed to follow the book very well.

ps - this boy at Taco Bell was flustered around me - it was adorable.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

IT'S MY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY FOR BLOGGER.COM. This day, one year ago exactly, I had made an account and posted my first entry. You all can look for that one yourselves. I'll have enough links down below to get everyone confused.
Like any FIRST ANNIVERSARY, I picked the best moments. The stuff I still think about and laugh, or quote. The pictures I love looking at and talking about them, etc...
Have fun, yo.
I miss the old times.

Funniest Entries
1 - haha, funny
The conversation between me and Pedro. One more piece of proof that he's shallow.
2 - kannivalism - クライベイビー
To this day, I like to tell that story.
3 - msn ims
Hahahaha.
4 - gaslight anthem - senor and the queen
"if you smoke pot, you'll be a cannibal."
5 - アンティック-珈琲店- - 1/2
It's funny because it's true.
6 - my breathing
Only where Cricket is turning on a flashlight. The second to the last. I do like to randomly quote it. STILL.
7 - g.고릴라 - 가버려
Only the conversations. Hahahahaha. I forgot about the awesome conversation completely.
8 - clash - rock the casbah
The entry speaks for itself.
9 - 新興宗教楽団nogod - 約束の地
Ah, me and my sister.
10 - joe walsh - life's been good
Just the beginning. The pictures of me are just a bonus.
11 - my cat's breathing
The first conversation. It STILL cracks me up.
12 - sinead oconnor - nothing compares to you
Any conversation on there.
13 - ac/dc - shoot to thrill
Hahahahaha. If only you could have been there.
14 - prince - little red corvette
Anything with me and Kyle. AND possibly the one with me and my sister, Amanda.
15 - pink - please don't leave me
The last piece of the puzzle. We still quote it.
16 - nick tune
Yesterday's entry. I thought about it this morning and laughed.

Odd & Ends
1 - will & grace
When I redid Adam's myspace.
2 - eagles - take it easy
When I listed the very few, of many, memories of my small SG town.
3 - slippery when wet
When I put Vaseline on my sister's doorknob. I did my parents' bedroom too, but my dad knew and totally acted like he could walk in and out of the room, blah. :(
4 - the beatles - lucy in the sky with diamonds
Speaks for itself. Props to Cricket for finding that photo.
5 - mst3k - riding with death prt 2
The e-mail I wrote to Christopher Moore, hahahaha.

Interesting Pictures
1 - witch hats make me smile
That was the first picture I ever posted of myself, haaaaaa.
2 - i don't know how it happened
Mohawk. Faux. Slept on my hair, and it made that awesome hair style.
3 - omgomgomg
Does anyone know what kind of bug/insect/thing that is? It looks like a mini-crab.
4 - savia - fragile
What these pictures don't show is how my ENTIRE RIGHT LEG is covered in my mediocre drawings, words, phrases.
5 - sinead oconnor - nothing compares to you
Since that entry has many pictures, I will give the direct link to the picture in subject:
6 - THE EYEBALL.
Hahahahahaha. It stillllll cracks me up thinking that that was in there for everyone to see.
7 - poison - every rose has its thorns
I miss Spanky's :(
8 - fray - you found me
Play doh. I loved it :)

Awkward Dreams
1 - alexandre kinn - tranquille
My face still squishes together thinking about it.
2 - journey - don't stop believing
Well, doesn't it create at least 5 seconds of silence?
3 - my parents talking nonsense in the living room
The second dream.
4 - radwimps - セツナレンサ
The.Best.Dream.Ever.
5 - asia - heat of the moment
It's the second to the last paragraph.

Friday, June 19, 2009

♪: nick tune

Amanda was at my door, knocking. She said something softly, so softly I could not hear. So, I told her to stop talking, I can't hear her, I'll be there in a second (I had to put on pants). I opened the door and she asked me, "Do you think it's okay if I vacuum?"
It was 10PM and I heard the parents' TV and I said, "No. Well, go knock on their door. If their TV is loud, then they're up."
"But..., I think I hear them talking."
"Just do it."
So, I stood in my doorway, watching Amanda walk into the living room when all the sudden we heard, "HAHAHA, MOLES ARE SO DISGUSTING!" From my mother.
That's all.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

♪: britney spears - if you seek amy

I don't care what you think, Britney's new album is really good. If you like sex, drugs and alcohol lyrics.

The past two nights I've had very dirty dreams. No, perverts, not sex, but literally gore. Blood and gore. The perfect pair. Well, one night was the perfect pair, the other was just sad.

Two days ago the dream had me, my sister, my aunt and some man I didn't know (who was my aunt's bf). We all lived in the deep country and me and my aunt were outside, talking. All of a sudden a coyote was behind me. I stopped, turned around and stared at it. I was slowly backing up, heart racing, when I said, "Lisa, we have to walk inside, very slowly."
"No, Heather, we have to catch them!"
Suddenly, she's going up to the growling coyote and grabs it around its neck. Not even trying with her, I run inside and try to reach the backdoor for my sister - the cries of the pack getting louder and louder - when I see her pinned to the wall by two coyotes, the uncle busy with one of his own.
"Amanda!"
She glanced up at me before the coyotes jumped on her, another coming out of nowhere. One attached itself to her neck, another to her stomach and another to her hips. I literally watched as she was ripped apart. I saw as she screamed, held up her arms at a faint attempt to protect herself and watched as she slid down the wall, blood and all marking her trail.
Later, after the attacks, they carried her to the back of the truck and I could see where chunks of her were gone.

It was horrible, haha. I couldn't go back to sleep for an hour.

Last night wasn't so gross, but my cousin confided in me she was dying. She wouldn't last for more than a couple more weeks.
Then she wanted to go clubbing with me (hahahahaha) and I said sure, what about her curfew. And, you know, she got caught, because she wasn't as good at sneaking out like I am.
I woke up before she died.

ADIOS.

ps - Raw carrots make me salivate.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

♪: the police - every breath you take

This song is befitting to the post.

I would like to begin my day backawards:

I just returned from swinging with Kyle. That's all we literally did for an hour and a half, swing at the local elementary school's playground. We talked, laughed, giggled and while this happened, at least two, three cars stalked the playground, probably trying to intimidate us out of there because they A) Wanted to do some drugs, B) Wanted to do sex, C) Needed to masculate themselves or D) All of the above. One car, as me and Kyle began our swinging pulled up, suspiciously, then, suddenly, burned out and did a donut before speeding out of the parking lot. Me and Kyle both thought it was cool, but not enough.
Second, that SAME CAR came back, blasting what seemed like 80s pop/rock music. They pulled up, backed up, swung around and stopped. That car sat there for a good 15-20 minutes. I think to try and intimidate us to leave which did not work. Soon, I was swaying to the music, nearly singing along until it finally squealed out of the parking lot.
Thirdly, another car stalked AROUND the playground, twice and finally pulled in at the walking circle thinking it was going to go straight through before it finally realized, hey, I'm fenced in. Morons.
I had to go anyway, curfew. I'm almost fucking 20-YEARS-OLD, less than five miles away from home and I still have a curfew. My dad was angry, that man drives me insane.
But, the point is, this shows how small of a town we are when all teens have to do is make their territory some playground at an elementary school, stalk the local young adults and hopefully get to do a-c and/or D. This is a small town consisting of old people with their walking sticks, yarn, hair-pieces, jitterbug cellphones, a dollar (in change) tip, mowed lawns and the average speed-limit 25 out of 35. They get on my nerves. I never want to be like that when I'm older.

The evening was pretty nice. Walked around said small town, alone, without music and stopped by the train. The said box of sprees was there, still, where me and Jakob found long ago (three, four months ago... Maybe, it's dated on this blog). Then I got the note me and Cricket taped in there before the whole cop incident. No signatures :( Only my sister and her friend. Going in the train, however, was frightening. I got up the steps and suddenly this baby bird darts at me out of fucking nowhere. It lands on the side of my head, then on my arm, and dazedly on the metal part of the walkway. The first thing I think about it, EWWWWW A FUCKING BIRD TOUCHED ME and secondly, OMG, MAMA BIRD, WHERE IS IT? Nothing came at me. But the baby bird ended on the ground, still safe and I got a picture of it. On my new phone.

And, finally, the morning/afternoon where another tornado hit. Right where Casey and her mom were driving. HHAAAAA. Maybe it's the slight comment she made about not caring about mine. AND her mom was driving. I'm not happy she was stuck in it, but I'm happy she had her karma.

Monday, June 15, 2009

♪: dir en grey - 凌辱の雨

This song has been the inspiration for Phase 7 whenever I couldn't write or think about something for the next chapter. The song is sexy, dark and a good opening for a sexy movie. (I was going to say sexy party, but Family Guy would ruin the mood.) As I was laying in bed the other night, half-asleep, trying to figure out where I would stand with the whole Zombie Apocalypse (it helps me sleep) it came to me. After months of searching through my dead-end head, it came to me: The beginning to Phase 7 (novel form?).
Of course, I had a page already in my head, the entire beginning to the beginning scene loudly speaking in my head. It all came so calmly and naturally it lulled me into a deeper stupor of my sleepiness. Thanks to that, I refused to get off my lazy ass and write it down. So, now, naturally, calmly I can't remember most of the scene. I could just kill myself (haha).

I AM STILL READING THAT FUCKING STEPHEN KING BOOK THE CELL. I just hit a hundred pages and I'm already sick of it. Normally, one-hundred pages I could read in a day, that's my goal for every time I start a book - a hundred pages a day. But, nooooooo. The book is so horrible. I want to get to the bomber already, he seems like he'd be interesting. I thought the Clerk to that hotel was, but, of course, he committed fucking suicide. If all the cool characters in that book, who are worth reading the entire book for, are going to die, I'm going to burn The Cell. Haha.

Tornado Update - (The news is too exciting to not mention it) You know the entry where I talk about the short-lived tornado? Well, well, we learned where it actually touched down. An acre away. This house I can see from my backyard. There's tree damage in an exact zig-zag through their woods (I can see where the tornado entered from my backyard, too). It leveled their barn. Think about it. I could have seen a real tornado if I had stepped outside and looked to my left.

Oh.
Haha.
The original purpose to the blog entry was to commemorate the NEW SEASON OF TRUE BLOOD. Fuck yes. Even in the first episode I saw a pair of boobies (hehe), two, count 'em, two sex scenes, a group getting high, dismemberment of a human and an old man taking a dump in a bucket.
It's going to be a good season.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

♪: depeche mode - wrong

At the mall, with my sister, there was an individual booth with fast-talking salesman and I accidentally made eye-contact with one of them.
The guy starts walking toward me and my sister. He's holding an opened tube of hand lotion, nodding his head with this ear-to-ear smile on his face. I look behind me, back to him, beside me, back to him and ask, "You're talking to me?"
"Yes, yes I am."
"I'm not going to buy anything."
"That's all right, just come and try this lotion."
"Okay, but, really, we're not going to buy anything."
"That's fine, you don't have to. Just try the lotion."
He gives us both a squeeze. He asked to see our nails. He didn't like mine, but he loved Amanda's. They're long enough to slit someone's throat with, and, yes, they are real. He takes my middle finger, on my right hand and starts to buff it with something. I see all his little nail sets around and think, 'Oh, great.'
"Now, this will last for two weeks." He turns to my sister, "You're going to be so jealous of her nails when I'm finished." He turns to me, "She's going to be so jealous."
"I'll be the judge of that," I casually say.
After he's done, my nail is really shiny, it's a fucking miracle. "Wowwww, look," I point my middle finger to my sister.
She chuckles.
"See? What did I tell you?" He turns to my sister, "See? Let me see your nails. Ah, you have polish on, don't you? Okay, here, see how it's off now?" She nods. And he repeats everything he did to me.
He asks us if we love it. "I like it," I correct him.
"Try it with a different nail."
Then he taught me how to do it. So, I now have two, very shiny, middle fingernails. So chalantly he hands out the boxes full of the product(s) we just used. He's telling us how we have to love it, where it came from. When he pauses, I repeat, "I'm not buying it, I told you I'm not buying anything," I say this with a smile.
"Hey, not trying."
"But I have the product in my hand."
"But you love it?"
"I like it."
He even offered a discount, and if I bought one, then he'd give my sister one for free. I told him I didn't have enough money to buy it (which is the total truth).
"I don't even have 50 bucks."
"How much do you have?"
"Four in dollars."
"Debit?"
"Twenty."
All the strict truth.
"Credit?"
I scrunch my face, "I definitely don't have credit."
"Oh."
"I tell you what, if I have extra money one day, I'll buy it." I fib.
"When will that be?"
"I honestly don't know."
"But the price."
"Won't be the same tomorrow, I know, but I don't have the money."
And we handed the boxes back to him and that was it, haha.

I know, if that was the funniest part of my day, then I need to get out more. Well, we were at Barnes and Noble later and this old lady dropped a straw out of the cup and, instead of picking it up, she scooted it to the side... Not even to the side, just a centimeter away from its landing point. haaaaaa.

Oh, met another author today, Stephen Zimmer.
Yes, that's his real name, I asked. I thought it was a cool name.
He was a very, very, very nice man.

♪: Britney Spears - Circus

I have expensive tastes, I'll admit it. Without even looking at prices, I will pick the most expensive item in the entire store, that's how I was bred. Animals are no exception.
I wanted to look up the breed of our cat, Princess, to see if he was a pedigree or not. He is. (He's sleeping in my dad's chair right now, adorable.) Then I saw Russian Blue. With the first look I was in love, they're beautiful! Then I looked at the rarity, the cost of a pedigree, and for a good, good one it's about 2,000 bucks. Ugh. Not like I can go to an animal shelter and pick one up. Of course, we took a Persian to a pet shelter once and it didn't even make it to the cage before the Volunteer was like, "Is this a purebred?"
"Yeah."
"Good."
And she kept the Persian, haha.
I have now a good idea of what animals I will have whenever I have the chance:
- St Bernard
- Black Cat
- Russian Blue
Of course, I know that I have to have proper training to the St Bernard and lots of room for him to run, walk. I think I want a girl. The balls on the male St Bernard would be disgusting, fixed or not. I will take training classes for large dogs before I buy one. I love huge dogs. I want one bigger than St Bernard. I want one as tall as me, but I think the dog could rule me out with just a growl, haha.

I'm going to go poke around at the mall. Wait for Cricket to stop ignoring me.
YOU HEARD ME.
I'M HOLDING YOUR MOVIE RANSOM UNTIL YOU ANSWER ME, BITCHHHH.

ps - my mother bought me some new face wash and it smells like vomit. So, now my face smells like vomit, gross.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

♪: se7en - 라 라 라

hahahahaha. SE7EN.

My sugar intake for this past week has been on the line named 'OVERBOARD.'
PMSing. I hate it. To death. Literally. Well, until I turn 45-50-years of age.

Storms and more storms. Last night's storm lasted for THREE HOURS and the thunder was so loud it seemed like a cloud floated down to my window and started doing its thanggg. Yes, yes, my dog and cat decided that I was the safety post. The cat curled up beside me and the dog laid down somewhere on my floor. An hour later, a big clash of thunder wakes me and the dog walks up to my face and tries to lick me. SO. I'm so tired I'm barely able to stay conscious standing and I get a cover, trip over the dog at my knees and make a little bed on the couch. I drag the dog bed to the front of the couch so Molly could lay comfortably under me. She does, I fall asleep with the cat in my arms... An hour later, I'm guessing, I shoo the cat, because the couch is just too small for the two of us. Haha.
I wake up around 4AM and head back to bed, kicking both the animals out (they followed me) since the storm has passed and sleep comfortably until 9AM. I hate waking up that late.

Mid-afternoon there was another bad storm and during it a huge CLASH sounded. The cat stuck its nails in my leg, the dog jumped up and my TV turned on with the DVR. At the same time. It was freaky.

This evening, it started to get really dark outside and my parents went to get food. About ten minutes later, the wind picked up and sheets of rain drained from the clouds. The big, tall, strong trees ahead of my house started to bend over one another. I knew by this point a tornado was coming... Wind isn't that strong during any storm. SO. I'm worried for my parents. Suddenly, after the wind is getting so bad I'm fixing to call them, they pull up and the rain is so bad it's mowing the lawn. I open the garage door. The gust of wind from said door is so strong, it knocks me back a step. I see my parents and they're rushing to get in. Finally, the news says something about a tornado forming four miles away from us.
My mom is clearing out their closet.
Then, just like that, the storm clears.
My dad was talking to his sister on the phone, saying how they just had missed it because as they were pulling in to the driveway, the truck started to get sucked backwards.
The tornado warnings were like the moment on the movie (or book, your pick), Twister, where the lovable Aunt is in bed then the tornado comes before she could get to shelter. The whole Gang is heartbroken and more determined than ever to get Dorothy out and about.

After the hoopla, Casey texted me to get my phone number for the Barnes and Noble membership discount. I was surprised, told her what happened and why it's funny after all the commotion she was at B&N la vida loca. She explained, 'Well, I'm not scared of storms anymore, so that information is useless.'
I replied, 'Uh, it was a fucking tornado. Not just a storm.'
Her ignorance angers me.
(and I told her 'Your ignorance angers me. That's all.' hahahaha.)

ps - SIMS 3 plays on my computer. Sometimes not well, but it does. I've been playing it A LOT. Made a character who looks just like me. Well, not just alike. I'm still working on that.
CLICK HERE TO SEE HANNY SONNY - THE 'DUPLICATE' OF ME!
I used to sit like that all the time. What happened to the classy me?
Hanny has a good sense of humour, book worm, loves writing, absent-minded and a perfectionist. She's now level 10 of her Journalism career and is having a baby with a vegetarian named 'Harold Stump.'
(Both of their names are characters in a story I'm working on, haha)

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

♪: dirty vegas - days go by

Mom - You never want to touch the Porter Potty handle. Sometimes they tip over and have poop all over it.
Lisa (Aunt) - Yeah, I mean, men go in there. That's nasty enough.
Me - Haha, I know. Men are so nasty.
Mom - You'd think after touching themselves, they'd want to wash their hands?
Me - They do use it for everything.
Mom - *chuckles*
Lisa - *chuckles*
Me - It's like that's how they mark their manhood - their scent.
Mom - 'What's that smell? It smells like ass.'
*Dad and Randy were in the room for that conversation, haha*

I was searching for a song about five to ten minutes ago to listen to while I make this entry. As I was scrolling around, I noticed how much music I have, after I had deleted about 50 gigs in the past year.
Click Screenshot for Bigger Picture


I need to delete, but I can't decide which one(s). I'm a pack-rat with virtual files. It's horrible. I keep asking myself, 'I may want to listen to that laterrrrr.'

Much love, folks.

ps - Today, I saw a truck (who cut me off) which had on its back 'Silly boys, trucks are for girls.' AND, on its tailpipe, the woman had a little horse, legs crossed, holding a blinking sign that read, 'WHOA!'
Hahahahahaha.

Monday, June 8, 2009

♪: pink - sober

Haha, the song fits today's subject:
If you are to follow this link you will read a very confusing story about what happened last night. Nothing horrible (well, it could have gone horrible in a split second, but ehhh), just, you know.

After breaking our sobriety, we talked to Stacy and Jay and decided we all wanted to go to this 'haunted house' in Oakland. We go, park beside a bus in a church parking lot and head out. The 'haunted house' was a very large, scary looking thing from the outside. If you wanted a traditional 'haunted house' material, this was it. Inside was trashed. Everything from the owners was left behind. EVERYTHING. Journals, datebooks, postcards, Christmas cards, sheets, clothes, pictures, books, bank statements, whiskey bottles (haha) and halloween costumes. Cricket found an old pair of Chinese slippers she loves ('old man shoes'), Stacy found an old Whiskey bottle (her and Cricket collect), and Jay found, after Cricket did, an old National Geographic from 1938 (Had an advertisement for coke on the back, haha).
I kept having a bad feeling and I whined to leave. My bad feelings are usually right, you know. They light up, I take a few hits, Cricket does and Jay does (since it was his). Stacy can't, she's prego. AND FINALLY WE LEAVE. We're walking back to our car when this cop is crawling beside us, giving us the one-over. I'm not worried a bit. I did, however, keep telling myself 'Don't look at the car as he's passing, don't look at the car as he's passing...'
So, as he's passing, I'm looking at his car, and everyone speeds up a notch. He turns the corner and we're walking as fast as we can without us looking 'suspicious' and finally, when we're halfway through the parking lot, I see the headlights coming back.
We all get in the car, doing the routinely thing to do (buckling, adjusting mirrors, rolling down windows). Cricket asks two or three times, 'Do I pull out or wait for him?'
The man who has been in jail for five years and is on probation probably rolled his eyes and sighed, haha. That's what I pictured in my head.
The cop comes out of the car, intensity in the car, I'm smiling stupidly. And as he comes into view, I notice he's a short, tan, buff Asian man who is very goodlooking. I see Cricket doing her smile, Jay trying to not look obvious and the officer leans in the car.
I noticed he wasn't wearing his uniform :( I loveeee uniforms on men, don't ask me why, ahhh. He just had his vest and a white t-shirt on.
"We got a call about some suspicious parking and people. Any idea?"
"Nope, not at all," we all answered together.
"There have been some suspicious break ins lately."
"Oh, yeah, I heard about that..." I said, thinking back to when the ADT guy came to my house and told me about it to sell his junk, haaaaa.
"You all aren't headed out of town are you?"
"Nope, she lives in Smiths Grove," Cricket said, pointing to me.
"Yeah, I live on 68/80." I pointed to the cop, but meant to point where 68/80 should be.
"I live on Louisville Rd." Jay spoke up.
The Adorable Cop continued, "Okay, then, have a safe night."
We leave and, haha, as we're all driving out, the cop follows us to the end of Oakland. As soon as he's not tailing us, the tension left the car a bit. I look at Cricket and notice how un-sober she is and how hard she's trying to drive. I click my teeth then turn to the two in the back and say cheerfully, "What a buzzkill, right?" Two seconds later, Stacy laughed, haha.
I talked about my sister, then said, "No, she's the same way with men as I am."
Stacy said, "What, a lesbian?"
"Haha, noooo. She's not."
Cricket smiled at me and said, "She just called you a lesbian."
"Heyyy! I didn't catch that, hahahaha."

That's about it for that story. We had more, but yeah.

OH! Cricket picked a 4-leaf Clover and gave it to me:

(i'm holding it and Cricket's doing the peace sign)
YOU STILL HAVE IT IN THE PURPLE TUBE, I WANT IT BACKKKK.

Saturday, June 6, 2009

♪: pink - please don't leave me

Cricket wanted me to update, haha, you know you hinted.

Ack, I've been writing on this short story of mine for about a week now. I only have three pages of it. It's such a stereotypical story, too. You know when you get that feeling and just have to do it although it's been done trillions of times before? He's an excerpt:
Charlie Nelson had long legs, narrow waist, small thoughts and hair you could fist and pull and would never break. Charlie’s clothes never laid the wrong way, her words were short, to the point. The way she moaned Ian, smiled when she moaned Thumper, made me crave her even in the tense situation I was in head deep. Thinking about Charlie Nelson helped my marriage and my “career.” It rescued my mind when midlife crisis knocked on my door. I hid my clothes from those extended pleasure trips just to smell her again.
That's my favourite paragraph, haha.

I'm also working on this stereotypical, zombies are attacking the world and everything. I just love writing fear and anger. So, to get started on that one, I just have to get in the groove of my words. BLAH.

I was looking through old entries on my blog the other day and read the first flash short story on that entry and, hahhahahahaha. sladfn dsofjdp. hahahahaha. I forgot I had said that. That's hilarious.

Then, something I don't think I ever put on here, wait, I did... A sentence worth.
Anyway. This is how it went:
Me - Cricket, I think that's a cop.
Cricket - No, it's not.
Me - I think it's the Sheriff.
Cricket - No, man, it's not the Sheriff *takes puff*
Hahahahaha, it WAS the Sheriff. One hell of a funny moment.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

♪: poison - every rose has its thorn

SIMS 3 is the biggest waste of money. BAHHH. It's awesome and all, of what I can play with it. My computer keeps wanting to crash every time I go in the neighborhood, etc... More people than people are having the same problem. I'm guessings 3 out of every 5 people are. Oh well :( Disappoints me. I'll admit I'm a little heartbroken. Now that I've seen what happens in SIMS 3, SIMS 2 doesn't seem very appetizing.

I've been clearing out my computer a little today (keeping some stuff for you, Cricket, haha) and I noticed a couple of pictures I kept hidden in a folder because I didn't want my mom to see them. You know, Cricket, the sex store pictures. Hahahahaha. I forgot about them! No, I'm not posting all of them, but just remembering it makes me smile:
March 2008 - St Louis - Spanky's

Cricket's dildo won. Mine was too small to conquer :(

That's us being ID'd. This is not a dramatization.

That's just me in the the shuttle to see the top of the St Louis Arch. I liked the way it was taken and how I look, haha. I kind of miss that hair of mine.

Now I have to start a load of clothes. And by clothes, I mean my sheets.

SAYOUNARA MOTHERFUCKAS.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

♪: beauty and the beast - something there


I touched my first fucking frog yesterday! Me and Cricket were outside and a frog jumped out of nowhere and Cricket caught it. Country girls, haaaaa. I touched its little legs, its head and then some part on its neck. A new experience.

She also bought me the Beauty and the Beast soundtrack! Bahhhh. I've wanted that soundtrack for at least two years. I AM VERY THANKFUL CRICKET. On my way home last night I jammed to it. I had my stereo up to 30 and just sang along, haha. I loved when in choir, my sophomore year, we sang a shitload of Disney songs. Including, Be Our Guest and Beauty and the Beast. I loved it, needless to say.
However, when I reached homebound, I immediately texted Pedro. He is also a big fan of the movie. That's our favourite Disney movie.
Me - Btw. Cricket bought me the beauty and the beast soundtrack. And when we smoke or drink together, me and you are going to sing a duet. You're Gaston. I'm belle. Hahahahahaha. Not joking.
Pedro - The bonjour song?:-)
Me - Of course. My favourite one.
Pedro - :-) I look forward to it.
Me - I would practise if I were you. I'm hella good at it. Beware. You're not drunk or something right now? I want to make sure you remember it.
Hahahaha. No reply.

Earlier that day, Cricket told me to ask him if all burritos had rice. They don't. Never fear fellow caucasians.